I came to realize that you don't think of me the same way I think of you when we are working. We maybe be meters apart, and I can glance over so many times but not once I match your eye. Some times I feel that you are looking my way, some times I just imagined what I desired. I look away, not wanting to feel so desperate and clingy to you. When you think of me, I'm probably at the back of your thoughts, but for me, thoughts of you keep popping up. After many experiences of this, I've gotten used to it, and hey, I'm okay. It's just the way you work. You get so focused on what you're doing you're just not good at multi-tasking. For me, I guess work was never more important than you. But I understand. I've learnt to be content, knowing although you don't notice me there, I'm happy to have you in my line of sight, I'm happy to be breathing the same air. Through the crowded room of people, I am always looking around. Some times I just spot your head, but you get blocked by the many other heads. When there is finally a direct line of vision and I can see you, I wonder, do you see what I'm seeing? But then I'll just admire at you silently from afar. That's why some times I'm afraid to interrupt you. Some times I feel like i want to hold onto you more than you want to hold onto me. But I've got to just learn to deal with this right? It's you, it's how you work, and it's how I should support you. Some times I dont know how to believe what you say, when you say you don't like what you're doing. As I see it, you do, more than what you say to me. And I'm okay with that. I just want to be there for you, although I can't do much, and I am more of a burden. Maybe you really did something wrong in your past life, because I am your bane. But if you let me, I'll be there, even if it means being at the back of the queue.
